I Chickened Out!

Plans were made for me and my friend Tamms to start kickboxing classes today. Unfortunately Tamms was under the weather and decided to start later this week. I, attempting to be a go getter and have that "nothing can stop me now" attitude, decided to attend the class alone. I figured this is my battle and other people can't accomplish these goals I've set for myself BUT ME. I am really a shy person, which may be hard to believe since creating a blog may not be on the "to do list" of a shy person...but really I am. OK, I set out for my first class and KNEW I would sit in the parking lot for a minute to "people watch." As I expected, they were all skinny and APPEARED to have been doing this for a while. Well I really can't be sure they had been kickboxing for a while, but you know how your mind works when nervous. Finally, I forced myself out of the car. I've lived long enough to know that, more times than often, nothing is as bad as we think it will be. It was awkward from the moment I walked in the door. There were a couple of chairs in the lobby, all of which were taken, which left me the only person standing. Ok, that is fine, no big deal. I watched the kids finish up their martial arts class until finally an instructor asked if this was my first class. He proceeded to look for my name on a list and gave me a form to sign. During this time the kids finished and those individuals that were seated got up to move into the room. The instructor began telling me a little about the class as we followed behind the crowd. He was really a funny guy, which made me more comfortable. He mentioned the class was fast paced and may be confusing at first. I was thinking maybe I should just observe. At any rate most everyone was against the wall either stretching or putting on gloves. I tried to strike up a conversation with the first lady I came in contact with. I asked her how long she had been coming, not sure if she heard me, I had to ask again..UGH. I believe she said a month, but it was so low I assumed she was just not in the mood for small talk. By this time I'm thinking to myself "I wish Tamms was here" so this would not be so intimidating. My mind went blank for a minute and I found myself walking out PRAYING the instructor or anyone else would not ask me where I was going. I felt defeated. After speaking with a couple of friends they assured me that it would have been intimidating for anyone going alone. So yes, I chickened out but will be there Friday evening with my good friend Tamms. :-)